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Rooney has been hosting his five- to 10-minute segment, "A Few Minutes With Andy Rooney," as a part of CBS' newsmagazine "60 Minutes" since 1978. Usually, he talks about everyday issues like groceries, bank names and holiday gifts in a satirical way. I will admit that Rooney really is the only reason I watch "60 Minutes."
During my freshman year in high school, I was assigned to watch a newsmagazine for my broadcasting class. As far as I was concerned, "60 Minutes" was the only newsmagazine out there. That night, Rooney did a segment on license plates and the things printed on them. He would say things like, "Florida says it's 'The Sunshine State'. Hot, too."
Last November, his segment was on Thanksgiving getting snubbed by Christmas in the retail industry.
"In the malls, some stores have had their Christmas displays up since October," Rooney said in his piece. "Kids are sitting on Santa Claus' lap telling him what they want before their parents know where they're going to get the money to pay for it."
I have two books written by Andy Rooney. One is appropriately titled "A Few Minutes With Andy Rooney." The other is titled "Word for Word." Both are filled with some of his earlier work, which he wrote in the late 1970s and early 1980s.
Inside one of the classrooms at school, there is a quote from Rooney saying, "Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done." I sometimes think about that whenever I type up my columns or stories.
One of my favorite quotes from Rooney is "I don't know whether the Greeks had one or not, but there must be a god who controls the dings and the little scratches, spots and dents that always show up within a few days on anything new we buy." He is right. It happens every time.
Andy Rooney has the answer to just about any question you can think of.
Q: Why do some people use curse words at random times?
A: "I think a lot of dumb people do it because they can't think of what they want to say and they're frustrated."
Q: How do I get people to stay off of my lawn?
A: "There are a few signs you don't fool around with, such as 'radiation.' I mean, if you really don't want anybody walking on your grass, that might be the one to put up."
Q: Why do we always take our summer vacation in August?
A: "Another thing that doesn't make any sense. August is a nice name for a month but the weather isn't good and the days are already getting shorter."
Rooney, who turned 90 in January, is probably the only guy I know of who can make you laugh and think at the same time.
"NewsHour" host Jim Lehrer may have put it best when he said, "His soap is slippery, too; his mailbox is full of junk mail, too. He understands. He's Andy Rooney. He's our friend."
