Keeping Up With Jones - The Missourian: Union News

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Keeping Up With Jones

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Posted: Wednesday, April 18, 2012 10:00 am

I don’t recall ever writing a movie review in this column, or really anywhere.

I probably mentioned seeing a movie before, or reading a book, but I don’t recall ever writing a piece with the sole intent to give my input or suggest that readers check out a flick, or stay home.

I have never given thumbs up or thumbs down, or passed out stars.

But Sunday night, my girlfriend and I went to see “Cabin in the Woods.”

It was a quiet night at Great 8 Cinema, Union, but there still were several movie goers in the lobby loading up on Jujyfruits, those small chocolate candies with the white sprinkles on them, soda, popcorn and even nachos.

I actually never noticed that this theater, or any theater sold nachos. I consider nachos more of a sporting event food, but there is always room for melted cheese.

I am also not sure if there are Jujyfruits for sale at this theater either — I normally just order the jumbo-sized combo that comes with two large cups of “I’m going to be up all night,” and a giant tub of “empty calories” with an extra squirt of “clog my arteries.”

We made our way past the counter and I made a pit stop. Even though I had no need to use the restroom, I went in anyway.

Since an early age, I had been trained to go to the bathroom before long car trips, before heading into a movie, and especially before suiting up in a snowsuit, scarf, hat, gloves, etc.

Then I headed to my seat, after washing my hands, of course.

We had to get to the theater early because Jami did not want to miss any previews, but I didn’t mind because the seats were quite comfortable and I give them 4 1/2 stars out of five.

And the facts that played before the previews were superb this time around. Who knew that Eric Stotlz was selected to play Marty McFly in “Back to the Future” before Michael J. Fox was given the nod. In fact, Stotlz filmed for several weeks before he got booted and Fox got behind the wheel of the Delorean.

I didn’t do so well on the quizzes this time around. Who knew that Rihanna will make her movie debut in “Battleship”? Well, who knew other than Jami and millions of other people? Apparently just not me.

But still, I give the opening facts and questions two thumbs up.

**Spoiler Alert**

The popcorn was amazing. The butter complemented the white cheddar flavored salt perfectly. Even though I could feel my blood pressure rising from the buttery salty mixture, it was still worth the year I knocked off my life — I highly suggest that combination.

Back to the screen.

There were some truly great previews prior to the movie, including a movie with Jason Statham called, “Safe,” that I will most likely see at some point in time. I give that preview a B+.

Other movie trailers were decent too, but not as memorable. I give each of them three apples out of a bushel.

Oh yeah, we also watched the movie “Cabin in the Woods.”

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